Tuesday, July 17, 2007

Summer Movies (spoilers)

Harry Potter:
Last night I watched the new HP movie in 3D on an IMAX. Only the last 20 minutes were in 3D, and was more like a special 2D (and not very good).

First off, I was a HUGE HP fan for a while. I had a counter-strike clan named HP (Harry Potter). My handle was HP_Sirius. I greatly enjoyed books 1-4. I totally loved #4. Book 5... Book 5 demonstrated how much of an amateur hack Rowling is. Apparantly not talented in the least and essentially got lucky for 4 books with a cute story. 500 pages of useless drivel. Pages better suited for wiping my back side. The last few hundred pages eventually got on with the story and were good, but the whole first half (and then some) could have been done like this. "We join Harry now as an angsty teenager." That's it! That's all you need. 500 pages of "Harry feels alone in the world", "Harry feels like no one else understands him." gets really old in 500 pages! I haven't read book 6 and have no intention of reading 7 either.

What Rowling really needed 7 years ago was a screenwriter, or director, to act as her editor. That person's role should be to cut out the boring crap. That is what we got with this movie. The exact same story, hitting all of the important (guess what fanbois, leaving out a screaming portrait, or something equally mundane is NOT important) bits, and leaving out the 500 pages of agony. The movie still gets the point across that Harry feels picked on. The movie is good. I really liked it.

It's not something that has to be seen at the expensive theater, but must be seen on a big screen.

Transformers:
Wow! You've already heard reviews and box office totals that tell you enough. You have to see this. If you haven't, just leave now and go watch it somewhere, I'll wait.

Welcome back.

I do have some problems with what they've done to my childhood. GM bought out Michael Bay, and Bay won't admit to it. They killed Jazz, instead of one of the new unknown autobots. They killed off most of the bad guys. Too much for one movie. Defeat a couple of the decepticons, but not Megatron already, what are they thinking? That's like killing Lex Luthor in the first Superman, what are you going to do after that? And they didn't do Starscream justice at all.

Live Free or Die Hard:
Bruce Willis.
What, I already said Bruce Willis. Maybe you need an extra little bit of Kevin Smith. There, that should do it. Go. Go now and watch this one too!

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